I Think I Need A Break

More than 2 weeks had passed since my husband's major surgery. From day 1, I watched over him at the hospital, leaving my 2 kids at home with my mom. I was my husband's official caregiver and I morning the night just watching over him, taking care all his needs and all. In the morning, while my father-in-law was around, I went home to check on the kids, cook breakfast for them including lunch, gave bath to my baby girl and fed her, etc. Before lunch, I went back again to the hospital because my husband requested me to be there to take care of him. Glad that my energy level was high that time.

A week after, hubby was discharged and still I took care of him. In fact, my duty was doubled as I now watch over my kids coz my mom already went home. I woke up as early as 5 am to prepare breakfast for Chloe and cook for her lunch as she would eat there. My schedule with baby Zoe was as is and often wanted me to carry her. I dressed up hubby's surgical incision, ran errands if he needs more meds, gauze or whatever he yearns to eat. I studied lesson with my eldest either in the afternoon or night and of course, I have to cook dinner, feed our dogs, throw the trash, clean the house, wash clothes... imagine that and I felt like I was a superwoman... but I am not!

This time, my energy starts waning but I still tried to hold on. I always late at night although my in-laws often come at home to help me. They even sleep-over at our house but still I took care of my family. Sometimes, I get easily irritated maybe because I lack sleep. When I weighed on our bathroom scale, I was horrified to see (although not so surprised) a big drop on my weight. It looks like I had a surgery, too.

I am tired but I still do these things in the name of my family. But I feel that I also deserved a break. This weekend, my family will be on vacation minus my husband. My mom joined me and my kids and I hope we will all be safe. I pray that heaven will allow me and my family to relax and unwind and enjoy this vacation that was planned ahead especially that the burden will still be on me. Hubby's supposed to guide us but now it's my turn to do it. But I am confident I can pull this and I hope we will all be safe until we come back home...